A Little Saddened

I’ve very excited for this journey I’m on.  I think homeschooling my LO will be well worthwhile, but today I just realized I may never do my job again.  I’m a Physical Therapist Assistant and I do enjoy what I do.  I haven’t worked in the last three years since LO was born and now I’m realizing I may never do it again.  It’s possible, that if our finances demand it I could do some per diem hours here and there after homeschooling hours, but if I continue to homeschool him for his entire school career, then that’s going to be 15-20 years before I would return to the work force and I definitely wouldn’t feel comfortable doing what I do after that many years, and I seriously doubt anyone would hire me anyways.  So, I may never be a PTA again.  I’m going to miss it.  I won’t miss the bureaucracy of the clinic, but I’ll miss the relationships you create with the patients and staff.  I’ll miss seeing the wonder and beauty of the human body God created upfront.  I’m not sorry I spent the two years in college (although the husband kinda thinks it was a waste now).  I gained a lot of knowledge that I value and it gave me the ability to help a lot of people over the 4-5 years I worked.  I’ll miss it tho.  I’m sure my LO and nurturing his thirst for knowledge will fill that void. Besides, I can’t think of a better thing to spend my time on than teaching him how much Jesus love us and how we can honor him each and every day.

God provides

I started this homeschooling journey months ago.  I started by fervently praying for direction on whether this was the right course for my family.  After receiving His confirmation, I started combing thru the mountains of resources and curriculum available for homeschooling.  Needless to say, I was OVERWHELMED.  However, today I stumbled upon, not only a wonderful FREE Christian curriculum that I hope to use, but a beautiful story of faith and God’s love.

Easy Peasy All-In-One Homeschool.  This woman and her family are a true example of devoted Christians and how God loves us and will always provide what we need.  She started this curriculum for her children and after sharing some with others, she had the opportunity to sell her curriculum.  She was compelled to keep her curriculum as a free resource so that she could help others.  After making this decision and turning down the source of income her family needed, they were blessed with anonymous donations exactly when they needed them and exactly in the amounts they needed.  They continue to be faithful and now serve God in amazing ways that provide and they enjoy. 

My parents didn’t have much money when I was growing up.  We always had the essentials thanks to thrift-stores, but despite the small income my father was making, they made it a priority to tithe and give to the church.  I firmly believe that it was because of their devotion to God; giving generously when we didn’t have much, that allowed us to have the rich childhood I did.  God blessed us with everything we needed, making my father’s small paycheck stretch to cover everything essential and then some, and teach us how to manage money, but foremost relay on God and know that He will provide if we stay faithful.

I’ve seen this in my own adult life.  Before I had my LO, I knew that I wanted to stay home with him the first few years and after doing many calculations and looking at our budget, I knew that our bills would exceed our income.  We had planned well with a good savings, but I knew that after a year or two I would have to return to work.  My husband’s salary hasn’t changed over the last three years, but we’ve felt compelled to not only continue our giving to church and others but to increase it.  Despite my previous calculations, I see our paycheck being stretched further and further to cover ALL our expenses and we haven’t had to use any of our saving account over the last three years.  That account has actually grown.  Although, mathematically I can’t explain how his income is covering everything we need, I know God is the answer.  He has continued to provide for our family every day and is now allowing me to pursue homeschooling.

I have seen many times how God provides for each and every one of us.  He is all I need and I know that He will continue to bless my family in every way we need, and He will bless our homeschool. 

Thank you Lord for your continued guidance, love, and blessings.  May others see your light thru the lives we live.

Planning

So I started planning some small lessons for my LO’s “preschool.”  He definetely needs to learn how to hold a pencil and we’ll be doing mini bible lessons and hopefully lots of other fun things.  He’s a little resistant when it comes to instruction and likes to do things his way, so hopefully we can find a nice happy median between his wild ways and my stricter nature.  I’m the type that likes to do things will purpose, goals in mind and he seems like the type to just have an experience without an actual end result.  I guess homeschooling will mean me learning to let go a little and him to take direction better.  A good learning experience for us both I suppose.  May God bless our little “preschool” lessons and give us a good start to this adventure we’re on.

I’m getting a little excited

I was the odd kid when I was little.  I LOVED school.  I was always eager for summer to end so that I could return to school.  I enjoyed learning and being creative.  My eagerness to learn continued probably into high school, but when the teachers stopped caring and the curriculum was no longer challenging I stopped caring some as well.  I still had a few courses that peeked my interest, like human anatomy, languages, etc, but I definitely lost some of that thirst for learning as well as some of my creativity. 

As I’m reading some of these books on homeschooling, I feel my spirit being reignited.  I’m remembering all the fun activities, and topics I learned in school and I’m getting really excited to share in this learning with my son.  I was afraid that it would be hard to come up with topics, activities, and lesson plans, but I’m starting to realize that I think I would really enjoy it because I still have that thirst for knowledge. 

A few of the books I read say that the parent has to have a love of learning or homeschooling might not work.  I still have that love for learning and I think I can make this work.  In fact, “I can do everything through Him who strengthens me” (Philippians 4:13).  I just can’t say how excited I am right now.  It just hit me and I think that this might be His answer for me.  I know that I can give my son the best education possible and I think both he and I will enjoy this learning path and I can ensure that he has the same thirst for knowledge that I had when I was a child.  I can inspire him to love to learn.

I really think that this is His path for us and I’m embracing it with open arms.  I’m so excited.  It will be A LOT of planning and work on my part, but I’m gonna love it. 

Deuteronomy 4:9 “Watch yourselves closely so that you do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them slip from your heart as long as you live.  Teach them to your children and to their children after them.”

Prayer

I always just assumed that my LO would enter Kindergarten at a public school when the time came and I’d take those memorable first day photos getting on the bus, frequent PTA meetings, and be that parent leaning out in the aisle to take pictures at the holiday concert.  I would return to work on a part-time basis and volunteer at the school, just like my mom did when I was a kid.  Unsure of when or where I’d return to work, I’ve been fervently praying for direction on this next stage of my life and as the days go by I wonder whether my original plan fits with His plan.

The fears that I associate with public school are many (violence, bullies, secular driven curriculum, unmotivated student) and while I would miss those “holiday” concerts (we can’t even call them Christmas concerts anymore) I feel like I’m being led down a different road.  Homeschooling also has it’s challenges.  I’m finding that complying with state requirements and simply finding the best curriculum/learning style may be challenging but without a doubt, time-consuming.

I’ve started researching what exactly homeschool entails and, while I’m being bombarded by a volume of material I never expected, I continue to pray and ask for His guidance and verification that this is the path He has for me and my family.  I’m still uncertain what the outcome will be, but I will continue to put all my faith in His wisdom and continue to seek his guidance.

Will this be our path?  Will I return to work?  Will we have to move to a better school district and try and sell our home in this dreadful market?  Only time will tell.  May He continue to guide us all down the path He has lain before us.

“For I know the plans I have for you.  Plans to prosper you and not to harm.  Plans to give you hope and a future. ” Jeremiah 29:11